Magic Mailbag Mondays
By Zac Cleary
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Ok! So this is a new series that I call Magic Mailbag Mondays. I’m really excited about it and I hope that you all, dear readers, enjoy it as much as I do. To me, it’s a nice break from the more analytical pieces and shows a more fun side of Presto In The Paint. So basically, this is a mailbag where you can ask me questions about the Magic on Twitter (@zac_cleary) or the blog’s official Twitter account (@PrestoInPaint) and I will answer them every Monday in the form of a mailbag. Which is why I have so cleverly titled it Magic Mailbag Mondays. You can ask me anything and everything, serious or not serious and I’ll answer them. Without further ado, let’s go!
1. If a wood chuck could chuck wood, would Tobias Harris average a double-double?
Now I like Tobias. I do. I promise. But to answer the question, Tobias Harris wouldn’t average a double-double if all woodchucks could chuck all wood in all the woods. Or if the defenders were made of the wood that the woodchucks chucked. Some sort of Ron Swanson hand-crafted defender woodworking. Which would be really cool, admittedly. I mean it’s Ron [REDACTED] Swanson.
2. What’s with all the Zac(h)’s on the site?
Like Childish Gambino said, I don’t know but I’m the best one.
3. Who’s your starting lineup and coach?
This is really interesting. I’ve seen a lot of these, but never a Magic-related one, so I couldn’t pass it up. So here’s my starting 5:
Penny Hardaway, Vince Carter, Mike Miller, Horace Grant, Shaq. Coached by: Doc Rivers
This team is essentially the 1994-1995 Magic with a whole lot more offense. Shooters for Penny Hardaway in Mike Miller and Vince Carter and strong low post presences in Horace Grant and, of course, Shaq. And Doc Rivers is a steal for $3.
4. If the Magic draft Exum, they will have a backcourt with him and Oladipo. What ends up happening to Jameer Nelson?
If the Magic ended up with Exum and Oladipo in the same backcourt, Jameer could be sent into the sun for all I care. All kidding aside, I think Jameer would make a perfect backup and provide a veteran presence to help mentor all of the younger guys.
5. How come Magic Johnson never played for the Magic?
Sometimes things happen and we don’t know why. We are only left with what could have been. But he did play an All-Star Game in Orlando so that was a pretty MAGICal occasion (oh yeah, these mailbags will feature puns).
6. Why are the Magic not better?
With the rise of the Wizards, there can only be room for one Hogwarts-themed team rising up the Eastern Conference. In due time though.
7. On a scale of 1-10 with 1 being awesome and 10 being stupid, what is your opinion of the mascot for Orlando?
1. No question. Stuff is the best. To me, Stuff is like Hodor from Game of Thrones. Is he stupid? Yes. But could you imagine a Magic game without him? Of course not. Although Hodor has a more expansive vocabulary than Stuff, but that’s neither here nor there.
8. Will Vucevic add a three-point shot to his game this year?
Well he can hit threes in 2K, so I mean I don’t see why not. Seriously though, I don’t think the Magic are all too concerned with Vucevic adding a three-point game, even if it is just one to two attempts per game. No sense in pulling him out of the paint and sacrificing rebounding opportunities. He was 3-8 from three during his rookie season in Philadelphia, but since, he’s 0-3 with no attempts last season.
9. Any way the Magic move either lottery pick for more experienced player? They already have a ton of young talent…
The only way a lottery pick is moved is for a higher pick. Rob Hennigan isn’t an impatient man. He comes from the Spurs and Thunder, two teams that built their teams with an organic core that was built through the draft. I fully expect the Magic to be another one of these teams. This draft is still loaded despite many people cooling on the whole “loaded” idea. I cannot say that I’m one of those people though.
10. What is the meaning of life?
Ok! That’s all I have for this week! Send in your questions and they just might be featured in the next installment of Magic Mailbag Mondays!